Decisionsno recommendationworks on paper too

Should I take the offer or stay?

You have written the list. You have asked three people and got three answers. You have played both futures out at 2 am and woken up back at the start. That is not a shortage of information — you have all of it. What is missing is a procedure: a fixed order that the question goes through once, and an end you can point at afterwards.

Below is that procedure in six steps. It is the one the Card Table runs, written out in full so you can do it tonight with a pen. Nothing on this page will tell you which option to take.

Why the advice you get keeps missing

“You are overthinking it.” “Always take the money.” “A risk premium of at least 20% or it is not worth moving.” These are answers to a general question, and yours is not general. They are also unfalsifiable — nobody who gives you one will be there on the Tuesday. The useful thing a stranger can give you is not a verdict but an order of operations.

The six steps

1. Write the question you are actually asking

‘Offer or stay’ is rarely the real question. Underneath it is usually something narrower: whether you can survive two more years of this manager, whether the money buys back time or spends it, whether you are leaving toward something or away from something. Write one sentence. Then write the option you have not put on the table — ask for more time, ask your current employer to match, take it and set a review date, turn it down and name what would have to change for you to stay. Most people decide between two options when there are four.

2. Separate what is reversible from what is not

Go through each option and mark every consequence as reversible or not. A job you can leave again in six months is reversible. Moving your family across the country, giving up a notice period you cannot get back, burning a reference — not reversible. This one distinction does more work than any pro-and-con list, because it tells you where to be careful and where you are allowed to simply try. Also write down what waiting costs you, in days and in what specifically expires.

3. Read an ordinary Tuesday, not the highlight reel

For each option, describe a completely unremarkable Tuesday eighteen months from now. What time do you get up, who do you talk to, what is on your desk at 3 pm, what do you do afterwards. Not the first week, not the best day — a Tuesday. Abstract words like ‘growth’ and ‘stability’ feel equally good on paper. A Tuesday does not. Notice which description you read quickly and which one you edit while reading it.

4. Sort your fears into risks and noise

List every worry separately. For each one, answer two questions: what is the earliest sign I would see if this is actually happening, and what is my plan B if it does. If you can answer both, it is a real risk and it is now managed. If you cannot name an early sign, it is usually not a forecast but your inner critic talking in the language of caution. Both are allowed to exist. Only one of them belongs in the decision.

5. Borrow three outside views — and then ignore them

Ask the empty chair: what would someone you respect, who is not involved, say after listening for five minutes? Ask 10-10-10: how will this feel in ten minutes, ten months, ten years? Ask regret minimisation: at eighty, which version do you wish you had tried? These are not votes. They are ways of hearing your own reasoning from a different angle. Nobody in that room has to live your Tuesday.

6. Seal it in writing, or it will reopen tomorrow

This is the step almost everyone skips, and it is the one that ends the loop. Write down: the decision, three reasons in your own words, the first concrete step you will take within 48 hours, and a revision clause — the specific thing that would have to happen for you to reopen this. Date it. When the doubt comes back at 3 am, and it will, you read that page instead of starting the whole argument from zero. A decision without a record is not a decision; it is a mood that has to be renewed daily.

If you would rather be walked through it

The Card Table is the guided version of exactly these steps. It asks one stage at a time, writes the Tuesday scenes for you so you are reacting instead of composing, and ends with the sealed record: decision, three reasons, first step, revision clause. It never recommends an option. In the browser, no account, nothing stored on our side — free during the build phase.

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Questions people actually ask

Will anything on this page tell me which option to take?

No, and the tool will not either. It runs a process and refuses to recommend an option — deliberately, because the part nobody else can do for you is the deciding. What it can do is make sure the question, the options, the stakes and your reasons are all on the table before you decide, and that your reasoning still exists in writing a week later.

I only have one offer and no idea what I want. Is this still usable?

Yes. Not knowing what you want is not a missing piece of information — it is usually the result of never having written the question down precisely. Step 1 and step 3 are the ones that help most in that situation. If after those you still have no pull in either direction, that is a real answer too: it usually means the two options are closer in value than the agonising suggests, and that the cost of deciding slowly is now the biggest factor.

Do I need an account to use the Card Table?

No. It runs in the browser, nothing is created when you open it, and what you write stays on your device — the server does not keep your entries. You can also run all six steps on paper without opening anything; that is why they are written out in full above.

What does it cost?

Nothing at the moment. The Card Table uses AI and is expected to become part of a subscription later. During this build phase it is free, with no account and no payment method.

What is this not suitable for?

Medical, legal, investment and custody decisions are out of scope and are pointed to the relevant professionals instead. Separation decisions are deliberately excluded as well. This is for large but unregulated life decisions: work, moving, study, projects, voluntary commitments.